A while ago I posted some strikingly "accurate" quotes about Chuck Norris. I thought it must be time for a few more!
Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number, you pick up the wrong phone.
While learning CPR Chuck Norris actually brought the practice dummy to life.
Chuck Norris went skydiving and his parachute failed to open, so he took it back the next day for a refund.
Chuck Norris can fold aeroplanes into paper.
When the President pushes the big red button, Chuck Norris's cell phone rings.
Chuck Norris can win an argument with his wife.
Chuck Norris can lift up a chair with one hand... While he's sitting on it...
Chuck Norris can light a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together.
Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.